Entries tagged with “Chlorophyll Cabal”.

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Mon 24 Oct 2011

Sitting by the Pool, Admiring the View

Posted by Patrick Rennie under The New Adventures of a Deposed Dictator
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Dr. Photius Callaway, last of the Killing Men, lounged by the hotel pool, enjoying the sun. It had just been one week since he had been deposed from his leadership of the notorious supervillain organization Technefarious, and he was determined to enjoy his imposed vacation from his chosen vocation. From the pool, he could see dazzling blue water of the Atlantic Ocean in its Caribbean colors and his fellow tourists frolicking in its waters.Photius doubted any of them were wanted by the authorities, locally or internationally, unlike himself. Instead of selecting a destination that catered to those that worked in his field, he had chosen this spot to get away from his fellow supervillains for a while. There was some personal risk for him in this. He had never bothered with a mask to hide his identity during his career, and while he lacked the grotesque physique some with superpowers had, his linebacker bulk was not exactly ubiquitous, either. He was sipping a fruity drink with enough decoration in that it could easily double as a flower arrangement, but if he had to be honest with himself, it really was not much of a disguise.

Still, no one had accosted him for anything more vigorous than a tip for service, so he hoped for a few more days of quiet while he tried to decide upon a new course. The past few months had been bad. At the end of his tenure as the leader of Technefarious, the staff had shrunk to one third of its peak size. One by one, his lieutenants had ended up in jail, dead, or in jail and then dead. Of the rank and file henchmen, most of them had been captured by the Establishment, the superhero collective that kept the Earth from plunging into global disaster on a daily basis. Freeing them had been his next priority, but before he could arrange it, his authority had been usurped by those unhappy with his leadership.

As a falling out among supervillains, this one was notable for the lack of violence that ensued. Dr. Crankpot and D.O.C.T.O.R had spearheaded the coup. The former was original founder of Technefarious back in the 1960’s, returned from the dead in mysterious circumstances. The latter was Crankpot’s greatest creation: an artificial intelligence that originally ran on vacuum tubes. Neither had been pleased with Photius’s denial of their leadership claim after their reemergence, and they has seized the decline of Technefarious’s fortunes to oust Photius.

Letting his eyes linger on a particularly nice bikini-clad bottom that was sauntering past, Photius reminded himself that the change in his circumstances was not all bad. Technically, he had never wanted to be in charge of Technefarious in the first place. Photius’s immediate predecessor, Dr. Processor, had not been a particularly good leader. Photius had found himself as the ringleader of those within Technefarious that wanted Processor removed from his position. Afterwards, his fellow conspirators stuck him with job of running the whole operation.

Photius had been good at it. Recruitment went up, fatalities went down. Technefarious had not fulfilled its ultimate goal of ruling the world, but with over five decades of failing at that, it was hardly the average henchman’s benchmark for success.

Now relieved of the burden of leadership, Photius felt disinclined to start a new crew. He had enough money that he could live a life a quiet debauchery if he wanted, although with just a few days of vacation under his belt, he knew that it was not a full-time career for him. There was not even anybody he wanted dead. Sure, he had enemies, but nobody he felt the need to hunt down.

The supervillain sipped his drink. If nothing else, he could do some freelance work for his girlfriend while he decided what he wanted to do with his life. Green Needle had offered him a full-time position with the Chlorophyll Cabal, but Photius knew eco-terrorism was not the niche he wanted to fill. However, she was his girl and killing people she wanted killed would pass the time.

Thinking a quick dip in the pool might distract his mind from his problem, Photius glanced over at the water. As he did, his eyes met those of a man who had just popped up to the surface of the water.

With a twinge of annoyance, Photius realized he recognized the man. The villain hid his face behind the foliage in his drink, took another sip, and held the glass awkwardly close afterwards. His obfuscation delayed the inevitable for only a few moments.

“I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to take the flowers and crap out of those before you drink them.”

Photius sighed and lowered the drink. “And then what would I have to hide behind?”

The man in the pool tensed, eyes glued to Photius.

The supervillain smiled back. “Hello, Bad Penny. I wondered when you’d turn up again.”

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Mon 20 Sep 2010

Chlorophyll Cabal

Posted by Patrick Rennie under From the Desk of the Dictator
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From the Desk of the Dictator: 

Welcome back from your weekend everyone.

I would like to take a moment to address some rumors making the rounds after last week’s visit from the Chlorophyll Cabal. This was not a preliminary to our two organizations consolidating. While I am personally fond of their leader Green Needle, the aims of our organizations are not entirely compatible. We, of course, intend to turn the world into an efficiently run technocracy with ourselves in charge. They intend to return the Earth to an ideal pastoral period that never actually existed. While Green Needle and I believe there will be a niche for the other once one of us conquers the world, what we seek will result in very different planets.

Nevertheless, any organization that turns down an opportunity to learn from its competition deserves to get beaten. At least, that was the reason Commander Bleach gave when he put in for leave to spend time serving with the Cabal. I suggested his request had more to do with all the time he spent with Cabal lieutenant Broad Leaf during the week. He assured me that he simply wanted to follow up on his interest in the strategic deployment of plant materials. I commented that described her (lack of an) outfit and pointed out he had to morals of an alley cat. He countered that we were all supervillains. Touché. Hopefully, he will return to us soon.

The occult department reports that they are not sure if we need to hold a memorial service for Henchman 68Y-9K (Sully). He was being shadowed by one of Plant Master’s Shamblers down in the science lab. Apparently, Shamblers have an unsuspected vulnerability to Lieber radiation. When briefly exposed to the backscatter from a demonstration on a rat of the green rage strain, the Shambler swelled up and exploded. Henchman 68Y-9K caught a clump of Shambler matter right in the face, and it immediately invaded him. By the time they got him to the medical department, his conditioned had stabilized, but he now behaves more like a zombie-like Shambler than a real person. The medical department has not been able to reverse his condition, and the occult department will not sign off on making a clone body because they cannot find his soul. It did not show up in their soul catchers after the attack, nor does it seem to be attached to his old body. Both departments will continue to work on the problem, but I have already authorized extending survivor benefits to his family to help with their loss. Sully’s squadmates will be having a few rounds in his honor at the Little Evil if anyone wants to join them tonight.

On a brighter note, we upheld our standing as the Inter-Evil Ping-Pong Champions by beating the Cabal five sets to two. Congratulations and cash prizes go to our entire team.

In other matters, if anyone has any information regarding the frozen henchmen corpses missing from the front lobby, please report it to your squad leader. I told security that no one will get in trouble for it, no matter how cranky they are that their cameras were tampered with. Were the bodies stolen to get a proper burial or for some darker purpose? Considering our crowd, I assume the latter, but I am genuinely curious.

Finally, the propaganda department is showing John Wayne movies in Auditorium A every evening this week, including his superhero epic, Iron Boots. Drop by and remember why we all became supervillains in the first place.

Have a good week everyone. And remember, the world is already ours – it just doesn’t realize it yet.

Your Leader,

Dr. Photius Callaway

The Killing Man

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Mon 13 Sep 2010

A Successful Operation

Posted by Patrick Rennie under From the Desk of the Dictator
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From the Desk of the Dictator:

Welcome back from your weekend everyone.

First, I’d like to congratulate everyone for the success of Operation Prairie Dog. The crystals we stole from the Magicforge Gnomes will go a long way in moving forward Project Jelly Doughnut. A special note of recognition goes to Extraction Team Delta for rescuing two members of Science Team A from the clutches of the superheroes Sunshine and Snowstorm. The heroes’ appearance was an unexpected variable in the operation; Sunshine and Snowstorm do not even follow the same the theme as the Gnomes. Nevertheless, Delta overcame the odds and kept their fellow henchmen from a stint in the Magicforge dungeons.

Despite the success, there were some disciplinary problems during a heist that I feel the need to address. I would like to remind everyone that we are a criminal enterprise dedicated Grand Gesture school of crime. Every person who dies during one of our operations is one less we will rule over once we seize power. Now, it would exceptionally hypocritical of me to say murder is never appropriate, but there is a difference between killing people and committing atrocities. If you lack the temperament to maintain the discipline this requires, our exit interviews involve a strictly minimal amount of memory wipes. The corpses of the six henchmen I had to discipline will be on display in cryogenic units in the front lobby for the rest of the week.

The injunction against casual killing does not apply to superheroes, of course. They come back from the dead more often than Dracula. So, if you see someone wearing a costume and they are not on our side, shoot to kill.

The Chlorophyll Cabal is visiting us this week to observe our operation, so strange costumes in the hallway this week should not be an immediate cause for alarm. If your food tastes funny at meals, it is because it has been spiced with an anti-hypnotic that can counter the mesmerizing powers of some of the Cabal’s members. As I pointed out to their leader Green Needle, it is not that we do not trust her people; it is just that supervillains are notorious for suffering from poor impulse control. Better, I think, to be safe rather than sorry. If you start to experience any strange effects from the additives or from proximity to Cabal members, please consult our medical staff.

The list of shared events and guest lectures with visiting Cabal members is posted on bulletin boards throughout the complex.

Have a good week everyone. And remember, the world is already ours – it just doesn’t realize it yet.

Your Leader,

Dr. Photius Callaway

The Killing Man

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